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The CD Jokes Lyrics by Mitch Hedberg

Strategic Grill Locations

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[Intro]
Ladies and gentlemen
I'm extremely proud and the Laff Stop is extremely proud to present: Mitch Hedberg!
[Mitch]
I have to record the CD, so I have to tell all the jokes I have
I've never recorded a CD before, I've told a lot of these jokes before. Ha ha ha ha, but I gotta put em on a CD now, see?
It's all gonna spread it out
All these jokes on a CD right here
These are the CD jokes
Thought of it today, I whittled the list down today
These are the jokes that I could think of today, which means these are the CD jokes
I might think of another one that won't be on this list, and I might throw it in, in a moment of spontaneity that you won't be able to detect
Cause you won't notice that it's not on the list
But I will be proud of the spontaneity
And you'll see it in my stride
So don't fuck up the bass tonight, Chuck
Cause we're on a CD here
So fuckin keep it, keep it goin. Don't fuck up a scale. These jokes all gonna go right here
So I wish I could play Little League now, I'd kick some fuckin ass
I'd be way better than before
Backup now? All right
That joke kicked off the CD right there
Kinda weak man
I got a ant farm, but them fellas didn't grow shit
They'll buy some carrots maybe for me
I like carrots
I dressed up for the CD
Credits
Mitch Hedberg

Mitch Hedberg

About “The CD Jokes” by Mitch Hedberg

Read the complete lyrics to "The CD Jokes" by Mitch Hedberg from the album "Strategic Grill Locations". On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Pop.

"The CD Jokes" is performed by Mitch Hedberg. from the album "Strategic Grill Locations" This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "The CD Jokes", explore more songs by Mitch Hedberg using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"The CD Jokes" is credited to Mitch Hedberg. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"The CD Jokes" appears on "Strategic Grill Locations".

Visit the Mitch Hedberg artist page at /artist/mitch-hedberg for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.