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Baby Lyrics by Stephen Lynch

The Craig Machine

2005

This is for my little girl
[Verse 1]
My lady gives birth today
I run to her room right away
She smiles with glee, then hands her to me
I look at my newborn and say
[Chorus 1]
Damn that’s a ugly baby
Damn that’s a ugly ass baby
I’m feeling quite concerned, my semen must’ve turned
‘Cause damn that’s an ugly baby
[Verse 2]
I can’t believe this came from me
I think her mom did too much LSD
She’s skinny like a twig
At least her nuts are big
But the placenta is cuter than she
[Chorus 2]
Damn that’s a ugly baby
God Damn that’s a ugly ass baby
I can’t take her home today, she’ll scare the dog away
‘Cause damn that’s a ugly baby
[Verse 3]
And when she smiles I find
Shane McGowan comes to mind
It makes me want to cry
When I look into her good eye
I always wanted kids
Is it wrong to hope for sids?
Fuck you it’s my fucking baby
Then the doctor calls me in
Mr. Lynch she has a twin
[Chorus 3]
Damn that’s a good looking baby
One for two on the good looking babies
I almost start to weep, now this one we can keep
‘Cause that was an ugly ass
[Bridge]
Damn that’s an ugly baby
Damn that’s an ugly ba- SING FUCKERS C’MON
Damn that’s an ugly baby WOOOH
Damn that’s an ugly baby
[Verse 4]
She’s got one good tooth and one ear and one eye
And thank god just one nose but it’s on her left thigh
Now doctor I’m asking you guy to guy
Would a really really really late term abortion still fly
[Outro]
Oh no my baby not me
I don’t want no ugly baby
I said damn that’s an ugly baby
Damn that’s an ugly ass baby
Thank you, good night
Credits
Stephen Lynch

Stephen Lynch

About “Baby” by Stephen Lynch

Read the complete lyrics to "Baby" by Stephen Lynch from the album "The Craig Machine" in 2005. On Lyrks you can follow along with the full text, explore the artist's discography, and discover related songs. The track is often categorized under Rap.

"Baby" is performed by Stephen Lynch. from the album "The Craig Machine" in 2005 This page provides the full lyric text for fans who want to sing along, study the songwriting, or compare versions across releases. Lyrks organizes lyrics by artist and song slug so you can bookmark and share a stable URL. Music lyrics help listeners connect with emotion, narrative, and rhythm in a track. Whether you are learning English, researching a favorite chorus, or preparing for karaoke, having accurate line breaks and section labels (verse, chorus, bridge) makes the experience easier. We link to the official artist profile on Lyrks where available, including biography snippets, top songs, and chart placements when we have that data. If you enjoy "Baby", explore more songs by Stephen Lynch using the links below. Chart and trending pages on Lyrks highlight what listeners are searching for this week. For copyright or correction requests, see our DMCA and contact pages.

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Frequently asked questions

"Baby" is credited to Stephen Lynch. Songwriting credits may include additional writers listed on the release; check the credits section on this page for linked collaborators.

"Baby" appears on "The Craig Machine" in 2005.

Visit the Stephen Lynch artist page at /artist/stephen-lynch for biography, popular tracks, and links to more lyric pages.